Monday, March 10, 2014

Five Years

Apparently my blog is going to turn into once a year birthday letters to my children and I'm ok with that :)

This little lady is 5 years old today!

I honestly can't believe I have a 5 year old. I was reflecting a bit yesterday (as I usually do around her birthday). Having a child with special needs/delays and having had the birth be a pretty traumatic experience really gives you a different perspective on birthdays and the passing years. I've talked a little before on how people say it goes by so fast. I know this to be true from having Beckett now and it seems like I blinked and he's almost 3. With McLaine the years have been full of so many changes, discoveries, surgeries, therapies, challenges, triumphs and all the things that go along with the special needs life. The years have been SO FULL of so much that sometimes it seems like she should be 10 by now. My perspective and emotions have evolved as well. I look back at the terrified and depressed mom with a heart full of love for her baby who was hit with so much those first couple of years and I don't recognize her. The fierce love is still there and we are still hit with the unexpected often enough but the overwhelming fear and sadness are gone. So, no the years have not necessarily flown by. More so, it feels like I've never ever been without her. I can't remember what life was like before I became her mother.  I am so blessed to be this little girl's mom. She changed my life in the best way possible and I don't want to know who I'd be if she weren't mine. 

My dearest girl,
You are a wonder. You are a treasure. You are so special. The day you were born you completely stole my heart. Your Granna bought you a painting that hangs on your wall with the quote "As the angels tiptoed from star to star, one of them slipped and here you are." There is no more fitting description of you. You're an angel on Earth. You are everything I never knew I needed. This year we had your biggest medical scare yet and mommy was so scared to see you so sick. From that scary experience, though, came the best health of your life. You have absolutely blossomed this year. Seeing your precious smiles and hearing your sweet laugh all the time again have made this perhaps my favorite year yet. You are exploding developmentally and I'm more proud of you than you could ever know. I love you to the moon and back and I can't wait to see what year six holds for you. Happy Birthday my love.


No comments:

Post a Comment